Happy Birthday, Elka!
by Kristen3
Summary: It's Elka's 93rd birthday, and Melanie insists on breaking the "Birthdates" tradition by taking her friend out. Can the girls make her realize she actually does have reason to celebrate? One-shot, dedicated to the lovely Betty White!


**Author's Note: **This story began as an offhand comment that there could be a story in Elka celebrating her 93rd birthday, since Betty White just had hers. I started it w/ no clue where it was going. I'm glad I finally got it finished! This is dedicated to the one and only Betty White!

"Good morning, Elka!" Melanie jumped up from her chair to embrace the elderly woman, kissing her cheek.

"Get away from me!" Elka responded, pushing her away. "I'm not ready for this so early in the morning. Or any other time of day!"

Melanie rolled her eyes. "Come on, you should be happy. It's not every day you turn 93!"

Elka sighed. "I thought we didn't talk about birthdays in this house. That's why we came up with our 'Birthdates' tradition."

"Well, yes..." Melanie conceded. "But this is pretty special. Ninety-three!"

"Come on. Age isn't that big of a deal anymore. I'm doing more than half those bozos on the city council, and they're all a lot younger than me!"

Suddenly, Melanie felt an even greater rush of love for her elderly housemate. She'd taken on the city council election last year, with no thought about her age, or what others would think. It was truly amazing. "Joy and Victoria and I are taking you out for drinks tonight at Stormi's. You can't say no!"

Elka thought about protesting, but she knew Melanie was not likely to give up. Besides, when had she ever turned down free liquor?

After a long day of city council meetings, Elka wasn't particularly looking forward to a night out with her housemates. But she knew they would never let her back out, so she reluctantly went along. No sooner had Elka come through the door of the local bar, before the owner was kissing her hand. "Happy birthday, Councilwoman Ostrovsky."

Elka nodded slightly. "This pleases me." She enjoyed using newfound power to behave as if she were the "Godfather."

Joy rolled her eyes. "Look, can we just get a drink, please?!"

"Right this way, ma'am," the owner said, nodding at her. "Everything will be on the house tonight, in honor of the Councilwoman's birthday."

"This also pleases me," Elka replied, smiling.

The four were led to their usual table and sat down. "Well, this is certainly better than our 'Birthdates,'" Victoria remarked. "At least this time I don't have to talk to a guy with an extra nose on his forehead!"

"See, Victoria's gotten into the spirit of this," Melanie said to Elka.

Elka sighed. As much as she hated to admit it, being here made her forget about her day. "This _is_ sort of nice," she said.

"Now, let's all toast to the success of my HBO series," Victoria said when a waiter appeared with their usual drinks.

"Shouldn't we toast to Elka first?" Melanie asked. "I mean, she _is_ 93 today!"

"Ninety-three," Joy muttered. "It really is true what they say, only the good die young."

"Yeah, well, in that case, you're going to be around a _long_ time," Elka responded.

"Come on, let's not do this. This is a special night," Melanie said.

For a few moments, the four sat in silence, each sipping their drinks. Elka thought about her life. Before these three came along, she hadn't had many people to hang out with, other than Mamie Sue. And she wasn't always up for the things Elka wanted to do. But these three usually were.

Suddenly, the silence was broken by the sound of Joy's cellphone vibrating. She quickly picked it up. "It's a text from Simon. He says he misses me!"

"You miss him, too, don't you, honey?" Melanie asked. She reached across the table to squeeze Joy's hand.

Joy nodded. "I mean, I know he left me for a good reason, but I still wish he was here. Does that make me a horrible person?"

"If it makes you feel any better, Joy, I've thought you were horrible from the first time I met you," Elka said.

"Elka!" Melanie exclaimed. "We said we weren't going to do that tonight."

Elka shook her head. "No. _You_ said it."

"But it's your birthday, Elka. Can't you lighten up?" Melanie asked. She smiled at her elderly friend, clearly reminding them that she was indeed "the sweet one."

"I'm an old lady, we're supposed to like this," Elka replied, not at all moved by Melanie's attempt to be cute.

"But you said this morning that age wasn't a big deal. Come on, this should be a night to celebrate your life. You've lived 93 years. There's got to be _something_ good in your life!"

Elka thought for a minute. She liked the way people seemed to give her whatever she wanted now that she was on the city council. She certainly wasn't above abusing the privilege if she could get away with it. But then as she thought about it some more, she began to realize she probably wouldn't have even run if it hadn't been for these three. It seemed that practically every day, Victoria was auditioning for something, or hatching one of her crazy schemes. And Joy went through men the way most women did underwear. Even Melanie had changed careers several times since moving to Cleveland. In a way, their lives had inspired her. But still, she refused to let them know how she felt. If she did, Melanie would probably keep hugging her. "Well, getting some free booze tonight wasn't bad," she said shrugging.

Melanie rolled her eyes, not convinced by Elka's answer. "That's not all. You love us. Admit it."

"We just got here," Elka replied. "I'm not drunk enough for that yet." She could tell none of them bought it, but it didn't matter. Sure, being a 93-year-old city councilwoman wasn't exactly easy sometimes. But there were certainly worse ways to spend one's old age.

**The End**


End file.
